..I've been dead pretty lately.
Im oh so sorry.

Well, Im not one to rant a lot. But I feel like it.

But these are the basic thigns that Im dealing with right now, thats preventing me from really getting into DA like I used to.

1) School started. Im a Junior. And even thoguh my GPA is pretty good so far. Need to make sure its good before I graduate. At least around a 3.0 by next year. It's around a 2.89 now.

On top of this, Homework is overwhelming and my math teacher has completley lost her mind. Not mentioning the American lit. teacher who really HAS lost her mind.

Psycho Crazy Bitch. =_=;

Hell, I'm crazy. But she's just the paranoid annoying want to beat of the head with a chainsaw kinda crazy person...if ya catch my drift?~

2) Relationships. We all have them. At least everyone should. And I do have a life outside of DA. I have friends and a boyfriend now. And I plan on keeping all my relationships strong. Cause I know once I go to college, ALLLL the way to San Fransisco. I'm not going to know anyone there. X_X

3) Thoughts. Yeah....REALLY thinking about the future. It's sorta given me major anxiety since I want to start a band there and help the World by doing so. Join a 'save the world' type organization with the band to help raise money for less fortunate people such as in Africa, China, Mexico,..hell, even here in America. EVERYWHERE bascially..~

But at the same time, its given my a rush. A high to just start my life and move forward. Make my life worth living.

4) Like almsot everyone knows by now over here. My friends here on DA dont. I have some unknown sickness that I've pretty much had...all my life. I jsut never talked about it, and it idnt really bother me much...until now. It really started hitting me a few months ago. And last week I was forced to stay home and miss 3 days of school (which suchs balls going to LVA by the way.), because my heart felt like it was going to burst out my chest, my breathing was heavy, and I was so dizzy I need my thirteen year old sister to help me to my room. Went to the doctor monday, and got my blood drawn (which by the way. I have a MAJOR phobia of doctor needles. ) and got my heart rate checked. Heart was good, yet the nurse said it was 58/118. She said "Oh..no. yeah..its a little low. But shes young, so its not uncommon." Im sorry, but I think thats bull. I might understand 100 or 90 or maybe even 80. But fucking 58? Come on. Theres a problem there.~

With my blood, they checked for any diseases in it. And I was told they found nothing.

What next?

I go get my skeleton x-rayed.


Because the main problem are muscle spazes, and major cracking and locking of my joints. VERY VERY painful at times that I either fall over or can't move.

But not only are my bones the problem but I get major migrains or headaches (yes...either/or), dizziness, nausea, exhaustion (not sleep...jsut physically tired), and at some points I start coughing for no apparent reason. Nothings in there, nothing comes up. I jsut..cough. And gag like Im throwing something up. When Im not evne TRYING to throw something up.
To basically top how I feel with everything to my physical illness to my emotional problems and jsut life in general since Im still in the can?
SHIT.
PURE GRADE A SHIT!<3




So to cut to the chase and end this rant.

I wont be back until sometime in December.
Most likely around Christmas Break.


By then, I should be starting commsions.
Because really, I need a job.
And I REALLY cant be waiting until next Summer for it.
I need money now.

At least that.
I cant even get a fucking car yet.
Because..OH MY GOD...I dont have my f-ing drive permit like everybody and their mama's do.

Whatever.

Dont care.


Im content with my green, flame painted, ELECTRIC scooter as of now.
2miles=15minutes baby.

Now thats a hot ride.~ ♥